Student in the Teachers' Lounge

This is my very first entry as an NYU blogger. After much deliberation on the name, I've settled on something I think describes what this blog will be about. This year I will chronicle my experiences as an NYU grad student in the field of education. As this is my second year, I'm embarking on the sometimes-rocky path of student teaching. It's only just begun, but I can already say that it will be an experience like no other - full of highs and a few lows, too.

Some information about me: I'm getting my M.A. from the Educational Theatre Program. My certification will allow me to teach theatre K-12 and English 7-12. I've loved my time at NYU so far and am looking forward to this final year. Before coming here, I worked semi-professionally in the San Francisco theatre scene. I also narrowly escaped a career in law. For me, deciding on teaching was like finding a forgotten favorite t-shirt. The option was there all along - it just took me a while to realize it. Now that I'm on my way to becoming a teacher, I'm feeling really sure of something for the first time.

This blog will not always be about teaching because that's not all that I do. I'm a lover of music, art, theatre, reading and spending my (marginal) free time with good friends. I will do my best to reflect on my experiences in this forum and provide an eyewitness account of what it's really like here in the big city.

Newsflash - student teaching is a rollercoaster ride.

Please don't misunderstand me - I'm very glad to be doing it, but it can be a major challenge. For example, today I went into school feeling good, but for some reason, when I got there, I just felt awful. I didn't want to be there and I haven't even officially started teaching yet. That will begin on Monday.

Experienced teachers tell me that your first year (as well as student teaching) is like walking through a landmine. You will make mistakes. You will fail. That is the hardest part to accept about this new career, especially if you are a person who is very critical of yourself. It's really difficult to swallow failure for me even though I know, logically, that failure can be helpful to learning. What is it that Samuel Beckett said? "So you failed - fail again. Fail better." I keep thinking of this quote as I plan my first lessons.

There is a difference between year one and year two here at Steinhardt. Year one is all about theory and pedagogy. We learn best practices and try them out on each other - fellow graduate students. Year two is when the pedagogy is put to the test on real students. Mine are teenagers and boy are they ever! They make me laugh every day and impress me with their wit and intelligence. They also frustrate the crap out of me when they won't pay attention, stop talking or do the assignments. It's part of my challenge to find assignments that will lure them in, but they are a tough audience.

As I said, my first official teaching day is Monday. I can't say I'm looking forward to it, but I'll be glad when it's over. I want to get started so that the awkward first few lessons will be behind us and we can get down to the real business of teaching and learning. I will be sure to post all the results here as I think they will be helpful to other teachers and those who are considering this wonderful, crazy profession. I welcome any advice, text recommendations, and well-wishes, so don't hesitate to comment!

--Gretchen

Actors James E. Webb and Kristin Stadelmann in Erin E. Phraner's Your DNA for an A

This year the 24 Hour Play Festival was even better than ever. Five great shows with a nice group of talented actors, writers and directors. Here's how it all came about...

Friday night the directors and writers got together to start the process. They were to bring an image to share - something that would spark the writing. Each writer drew an image and each director drew an amount of actors and their physical description. From that point, the meeting dispersed and the writers went home to construct something brand new that would be performed in less than 24 hours.

The next morning we actors showed up at 8:45am ready for our scripts and to meet the people we'd be working with. I was delivered a script called Fraternizing With the Enemy, written by PhD candidate, John Socas. Me and three other actors and director Daphnie Sicre set out to cast, read through, rehearse and learn the script by 8pm last night.

I have to say it was a really fun process - and a demanding one as well. I have not acted formally in a long time. I usually place myself in the director's chair. Directing was my college major and it's just where I usually end up in the theatre. This year I wanted to challenge myself and throw caution to the wind. Being on stage has always been fun for me and I love the challenge of getting inside a character. Last night I had the challenge of playing a domineering sorority girl on Hell Night. I've never even considered joining a sorority, so it was funny to step way outside of my comfort zone.

They process went really well for our group and the show went off without a hitch. Watching the other performances, I was amazed and pleased to see just how talented everyone in the Educational Theatre department really is. Sometimes you forget when immersed in such an academic setting, that we have this well of talent which brought us into theatre in the first place. It's very rewarding to see my colleagues put themselves out there like that and do so well.

If you didn't happen to catch last night's performance, keep an eye out for other Ed. Theatre events coming soon, including The Eumenides, directed by Professor Nan Smithner.

-G

I scored a couple of minor victories on Monday when I taught my first lesson to my 11th grade English class. It's important to state right away that I can't mention the name of the school or any of the kids' names for legal reasons, so I'll try to be non-descript. We began a poetry unit - both analyzing and writing. I hoped that no one would riot or yell or cuss at me and no one did. I hoped that a few of them would do the work, and most of them did! In fact, some of them even enjoyed it, reading their fresh poems to each other and laughing. I think any time kids are smiling while working, you've accomplished something.

Don't get me wrong. It wasn't everyone. There were those who weren't paying attention and those who just weren't in the mood to write poetry. But as my CT says, it's all about minor victories at this point. YES! I got the really reluctant (scared) writer to put his pen to page. YES! I have connected with one of the quiet students through a shared interest. YES! They accepted me as their new teacher without ANY questions - probably due to the fact that I've been so present since day one.

Tomorrow I'm teaching again and who knows how it will go! In fact, who ever knows how a lesson will go. It's crazy! But I have to say that I love all of my students and they crack me up on a daily basis. I'm looking forward to tomorrow morning and hoping that will all be in the mood for a good day.

Well that's it. Week one of student teaching is over and I can never go back and have a new first week. I know I'll be thinking of this week for years to come as I push forward into my new career. Here are some highlights and low points from the week.

I have several students who consider themselves to be bad writers. I think it's common for everyone to hate their own writing, really. Writing is such a personal process - it's an extension of thinking. To reveal our own writing is to reveal our true selves, especially when it's poetry. One high point of the week was the process of getting students to put pen to page. No one wanted to do this assignment; everyone was worried that what they would write would sound stupid. And in reality, not everyone did the assignment. A little over half of the students completed it, but I'm a glass half full kind of person in this instance. Some of the work was really great, some lazy and hurried, but at this point I was just happy to see them turn something in.

What makes me sad about teaching is when students don't believe in themselves. For whatever reasons (probably many), some students have just checked out of school all together. When you're teaching, your heart goes out to these kids because they're not bad people - they just need a lot of extra help and encouragement. Sometimes this extra help is refused like in the case of one of my students. My low point of the week was that I failed this student in a way; he didn't write and I didn't convince him to write. A professor told me that students will write when they believe that I really want to hear what they have to say. I know that it's a process and these things take time, so I will practice patience and keep expecting great things from him. Hopefully at some point he will begin to expect them for himself.

This week I wrote along with the students, something suggested in one of our main pedagogical texts on writing instruction. If you show your own process, students will many times be more willing to take a risk. Unfortunately, I was not able to write in class because I was too busy helping them, but today I presented my writing for their feedback. It was strange to place my poem on the overhead projector and say, "OK, what warm and cool feedback can you give me about my poem?" I was a little embarrassed and worried that they would tear it apart. It's exactly how they feel when I ask them to read their work - probably even worse since they are teenagers and their self-esteem is rocky. In the end, my students were probably too easy on me. My poem had problems and I knew that, but I did get one good suggestion from one of my students. It's just a baby step in the right direction of dialogical instruction. They learn from me; I learn from them. Or at least that's how it's supposed to work.

Next week will be plain old week two but still important for many reasons. I will be observed for the first time. We will go deeper into narrative writing. We will continue to get to know each other and form relationships. I made a lot of mistakes this week, and I hope to fix some of them next week. And even if I don't, I'll be sure to post it all here for my readers to learn from.

Happy weekend.
-Gretchen

The title refers to a commercial I just saw about the NYC Public School system. It was a funny coincidence because I was thinking about what to write in this post when I saw it. I would have to agree with the comment as well as the one that follows..."but we are definitely making progress."

For the past two weeks I've lived the non-perfection/progress and let me tell you it's not easy. Being a teacher in a tough school is a real challenge. My kids are amazing one on one and I truly enjoy their company, but they have no structure and sometimes seem to not care. It's a curse of being a 16 year old in the best city in the US. There are so many distractions, bad role models, absent or overworked parents and people who seem to do just fine financially with no education. Yet, we in the business of educating young minds want each student to know they have the ability and right to succeed. "Permission to fail" is not something I want to give in my classroom.

So yes it's not perfect - my classroom or the public school system. But there is progress. In my ongoing struggle for classroom management I learned that this particular group of kids responds well to a stern yet respectful tone. I don't b.s. them and I tell them when they are disappointing me and disrespecting each other. I've struggled with the right tactic for classroom management because I don't want to be a jerk and I'm not looking for "control" or "power". I just want them to be quiet when I'm giving the directions/lesson so that they understand what's expected of them and are able ask me clarifying questions. I don't think that's too much to ask, but they do! :)

This weekend will be planning central at my house - planning all the lessons for next week as we round out our unit in narrative writing. Time marches on and I will soldier through this challenge as I always do in hopes that by the end of the semester I will have grown as a teacher and they will be better students.