"Newly Acquired Pen"

I face each day with the ripe opportunity to expand academically, intellectually, socially, spiritually, emotionally, financially or vocational; not necessarily in that order, either! I find myself learning in and out of the classroom. I appreciate knowledge and I challenge myself to investigate what I am being taught; not just accepting information because it is being fed to me. That is the beauty of living in a free society. With such privilege comes the responsibility to utilize my talents and help to enhance the lives of others. On Wednesday, 11/04/09, I had the chance to do that. I previously mentioned that I am a member of Pi Pi which is the NYU chapter of Phi Alpha, the honor society for social work students. http://www.phialpha.org During the semester, each member commits to completing 5 hours of community service which can happen between a variety of select agencies and events.

This particular endeavor would lead me to “Room to Grow” which is a non-profit organization dedicated to enriching the lives of babies born into poverty throughout their critical first three years of development. http://www.roomtogrow.org I had my regularly scheduled 8 hour field placement earlier that day. I traveled by bus from my internship in Newark to Newark Penn Station. I then caught the PATH train to Journal Square and connected to the appropriate PATH train that would allow me to travel to 23rd St. in Manhattan. I walked back to 21st St. and curiously maneuvered my way to the agency. Trust me when I tell you- I was tired when I left my placement! I had never been to this agency nor had I ever gotten off the train at 23rd St. This was a new experience; one that I was open to. As other members began trickling in, we began to experience the environment and collectively share with one another. What was our task from 5:30pm-7:30pm? We arranged and sorted children’s clothing and accessories, toys, furniture, books and miscellaneous items in preparation for an event the agency was having the following day. There is something to be said for selfless sacrifice! I’d like to think that I am growing because I know that I have……. room to grow.

Any energy left? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xsRWpK4pf90

I was not prepared to read about the death of a fellow NYU student early last week. The sketchy details alleged that the apparent suicide happened in the Bobst Library in the early hours of the morning. While the unidentified student was said to be an undergraduate junior in the College of Arts & Sciences whom I did not know, almost immediately I experienced a sense of loss. I started to think about the family and friends of this student. I thought about all of the stressors that plague students; academics, social, financial, etc… My prayer is that the loved ones close to this student will find peace in the days to come.

This tragic incident reminded me of a conversation that I had with a friend of mine. He is also in the Advanced Standing program. I commented about wanting to utilize the services of the Wellness Center at NYU. For one thing, all NYU students are allotted up to 10 free, short term counseling sessions. Free is always nice when you are a student! Second, I wanted to experience the dynamics of being a patient and not the clinician. I believed this would prove useful for me in my work with clients. The response from my friend caused me to pause and think twice about that idea. He joked that there would be a paper trail, I would be labeled and other uncertainties would follow.

Our society seems to pitch mental health in a negative light. How unfortunate the stereotypes that possibly deter a potential client from seeking services in the mental health arena. Instead of feeling confident about tapping into available services (regardless the motivation), one has to worry about how she will look, associated stigmas and other implications. How unfortunate that some believe talking with a therapist is a sign of weakness. I personally think it shows a great strength; to recognize a temporary deficit within one’s self and move to change. That is powerful!

Oh my! Did I skip the formalities and get right down to business? Well, let me bring you up to speed. I am Miss Jeri McQueen; mature, evolving student with a very distinct edge that I believe will compliment my efforts in the field of social work. This is a second career for me. I am in the Advanced Standing MSW program here at NYU. At present, I commute from New Jersey two days a week to attend classes. I have an early class on Tuesdays. On Thursdays, I have three classes scattered between the hours of 8am and 6:35pm. My field placement is in New Jersey. I have a part time job. And yes, I am a single parent. Lucky for me, my only child, a teenage daughter, attends a New England boarding school on a full scholarship. So the day to day, pounding the pavement activities, revolve around traveling to and from home to go to school, intern and work. My daughter and I are close and talk, text and email daily. There are periodic, year round trips (easily 4hrs each way barring traffic delays) to her campus to attend special events and stay connected to her.

My days are long and my nights are fleeting! Being in the advanced standing program requires a special commitment of your time. Consider carefully your options. What was my motivation for selecting this program? I am an older student and the brevity of the program attracted me. I am also entertaining the idea of an additional degree after I finish this program. If you are contemplating NYU as your choice for graduate school, I recommend that you consult early and often with the NYU admissions department. Make a trip to the campus and immerse yourself in the spirit of the community. Take risks! Now you know.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikzQmC3S-mE

Half the semester is done…already! That thought is simultaneously refreshing and yet creepy. I just got here in September 2009. And since I am in the Advanced Standing MSW track, I do not have much longer before I am finished with the program. Two semesters is very fleeting! [proceed with the stroll down memory lane]. It literally seems like yesterday that my professor at Rutgers University was suggesting NYU for grad school. After enough gentle prodding and many hours reading about the school at http://www.nyu.edu I decided to see NYU for myself. It was Friday, 11/21/08 when I chose to hop on over to NYU and visit its Washington Square campus. Having previously checked out two other graduate programs (one in NJ and the other in NY), I appreciated that NYU offered open drop-in sessions to tour the premises and have counseling individually. That was a personal touch that impressed me because when I thought of NYU, I imagined this monster campus that swallowed you up. On the contrary, when I arrived at the campus to speak to someone from the Admissions Department, it was nice to see the quaint Silver School of Social Work building nestled neatly on the corner of University Place and Washington Square North. The NYU community spanned many blocks, intricately weaving in with the diverse culture and crisp atmosphere. You really have to see it for yourself!

Not a frequent rider of the PATH trains, I asked my mom to join me. For her it was a delight because she formerly worked in Manhattan for many years before retiring after 32yrs of service in 2005. From Newark Penn Station, we took the PATH train to Journal Square (10 minute ride) and then connected with the train that goes to 33rd St. We exited at the 9th St station (that is stop #4 and roughly a 15-20 minute ride) and leisurely strolled to the campus. The walk was under 10 minutes. When we entered the building, the historic premise automatically took me back to another place in time. Seriously! There was an ambiance that ‘floated in the air’ and I was instantly captivated! We met with Robert Sommo in admissions. He entertained our questions from the application process to acceptance to scholarship monies to classroom sizes. He allowed us to peak in on a class that was in session. It was definitely at that moment that I envisioned myself sitting in the classroom at NYU. For me, it was a done deal! All I needed then was for NYU to accept me. At the end of our visit, my mom started inquiring about food (it was nearing lunch time) and wanted to know where to find falafel and Orange chicken. Mr. Sommo even gave her a few suggestions. Wow! To top that one better, by the time I got home, Mr. Sommo had already sent me an email thanking me for visiting the school. He even referred to my mom’s inquiries about the foods. How’s that for personal? [that concludes the stroll down memory lane].

In the midst of midterms right now, I just finished a research exam (of which I created 111 index cards to study) and submitted a paper for a different class on Thursday. Yes, I have healthy (hope so) levels of anxiety living with me right now. I have two additional papers that are due in the next two weeks. My intern experience is consistently busy as I have a caseload of 12 clients and I am working on a social policy project (a treatment fair). I cannot forget my obligation to the Phi Phi Chapter at NYU (Phi Alpha Honor Society for social work students). I have 5 hours of community service to fulfill before the semester ends. It sounds easy enough, right? Think so? OK! The tricky task is trying to match your availability to participate in the events (any given day) where the chapter has already partnered with select agencies and organizations. Not so easy to do when you factor in your school, intern, work and personal schedules. All of these experiences require that I am focused, flexible, and fearless. LOL...… (hey, any room for fun?)

Time is of the essence! Already the Spring term 2010 course selections are available for viewing. Whew! But in the hustle and bustle of life at NYU, the personal touch is not lost. I recently attended a bloggers meeting and I saw Mr. Sommo. After the meeting, I approached him and started with the line “Mr. Sommo, you may not remember me, but I visited NYU….” He replied that he did remember both my mom and I and he also pointed out that I had interacted at http://www.facebook.com with other newly admitted Advanced Standing MSW students.True story!

For the readers who stuck with me through this unusually long message, here’s a treat! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0&feature=youtube_gdata

I am both honored and flattered to see that my writing inspires and provokes incredible thought processes and a deeper human experience. (Insert: a long exhilarating sigh of relief while I tiptoe through the tulips with my hair carelessly being tossed by the teasing wind). WHAT??? On the real, it is baffling and suspicious when an expressed opinion has no obvious connection to the information that is being shared; other than to cleverly weave an advertisement onto the website. (Image: throw both hands on either side of your face in despair and repeat “oh my” with breathless ease as you tilt head to the other side). HUH???

Well, let me explain. A reader commented about my blog “Newark, NJ and other Myths”. The initial comment itself was seemingly harmless; “nice blog”. But through my eyes, I interpreted it differently as I continued to read the remainder of what was written. Next came the question asking if I knew where the writer could find a good dog walker near NYU. He continued that he heard of a new place, told me the name and even gave me the website. Now, if this writer of seemingly reasonable intelligence was already armed with this information (name of business & website), why approach me in this manner on his chosen subject matter? Presentation is everything. I personally found it offensive that he started with a generic compliment, offered no legitimate segue way (I was talking about Newark, NJ) to what he asked and then pushed to get the free advertisement. I do not see any correlation (wow, research class sneaking up on me) between Newark, NJ and dog walkers. The flip side to all of this is that maybe it was just a compliment and an innocent query about competent dog walkers. To that writer, thank you for making me think with greater insight this morning. Perhaps I was gently pushed to over think and interpret. At what point does society allow us to just take things at face value? Is that ever an option for all populations? And how does one’s experience lend to interpretation? It’s no secret that our social structure is so slanted that it’s pathetic. And what are we doing about it? I’d love to know how members of the audience feel. I welcome your response. What you think?

what's going on?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtUMa0FtuWY

I am exhausted- both physically and mentally. I still have a cold and I am still processing the day’s events while I try to relax. The two don’t jive because I had quite an exciting day. So if I really want to relax, I should throw on something classical. NOT! I took food to my internship today to share with fellow coworkers. I take no credit for how my coworkers enjoyed the home cooked meal (baked macaroni & cheese, turkey wings, collard greens and cabbage); MY MOTHER PREPARED EVERYTHING! I love the sense of familiarity that accompanies good food. It doesn’t hurt to create office allies. As the student intern, I have to ‘get in where I fit in’ and having coworkers who are willing to tolerate you while you use their computer goes a long way.

I had my first caseload meeting with my clients today. These meetings can be on any topic relating to reentry into society. They are 12 men who vary in age from 18 to 52. I have been meeting with them individually shortly after the intern period started on 09/21/09. I had a sense of each person’s character but it was very different to see them function in a group. Leading up to the caseload meeting, I kept reminding myself that my clients have a relationship exclusive to them because they live in the same dorm room and interact daily. I am there 3 days each week and see them in a different capacity. I was prepared and open to this new experience. I intern at a residential facility which offers a rehabilitation program for the criminal justice population. Okay, I’m trying to be mindful of the concepts I have been learning in my clinical practice with groups class. It was easy to remember the beginning, middle and end (stages of group) which I nicely integrated into our meeting. As the group facilitator, I did a lot of guiding in the early portion of our meeting. I opened the meeting (after explaining my expectations) asking the question: why do we need structure? I encouraged honest responses and welcomed all opinions. The group was engaging. I was happy (don’t clap yet).

Fast forward: four of my clients showed up more than 20 minutes late, to which I instructed them to write a one page explanation why they were late (due Wednesday). One of the four became mildly irate because of a request he had previously asked of me and I could not fulfill. From there, he said he would not participate with the group and that I was not his counselor anymore! Dang! Now we didn’t have that skit in class yet! After that outburst, I still addressed him (firmly) with respect but he just wasn’t buying it. What I didn’t expect was for the group to jump to my defense and chastise him when he persisted to argue. I saw myself as the outsider (intern) while the group had begun to grow accustomed to and less suspicious of me. I finally managed to restore order, not by talking over the guys (that wasn’t working), but by allowing the guys to express their opinions based on the content of the member’s outburst. That actually worked better. And I definitely wanted to ensure that the angry group member was not in danger of retaliation later (look at where they are). Interesting dynamics- wow! What is my advice to you? Be familiar with the population you want to intern with. Even after that, expect the unexpected! I have previously worked with this population but not in this setting. I have caseload meetings every two weeks. I’ll be starting a book club on my wing soon. But that’s for another day.

If you're trying to relax like I am, have a listen.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GjxlguPYo0

We all know the fairy tale about Little Red Riding Hood (what was her affiliation), right? Briefly, she wants to visit her sick grandmother and she travels through the forest to get there. Through deceit and trickery, this mean, crafty, nasty (you get the picture?) wolf intercepts Little Red Riding Hood while she is en route. The creepy wolf gets to grandma’s house first, throws grandma (“SUPPORT SERVICES”) in the closet and pretends to be the grandma in the bed. All the while, this wolf’s (can you say “SOCIETY”) intention is to devour Red Riding Hood (“CLIENT”) and move to the next victim. Just as the wolf advances to attack his prey, along comes the hunter (“SOCIAL WORKER”) to save the day. Now you may not see, agree or understand how I am looking at it and that is okay. I chose to align grandma as the support system who becomes shut in, bound or restricted because that is the state of affairs regarding support services today. There is such a wide (suspicious) disconnect between agency A and agency B if their goals are “supposed to be” the same. Is that just a coincidence?

Now back to my original question. What’s wrong with the hood? Is he/she a victim of society (and therefore not to blame) or the product of a dysfunctional family unit and sorely in need of a practical, life changing intervention? What’s wrong with the hood? Has the practice of redlining (withholding home loan funds or insurance from neighborhoods considered poor economic risks) repeatedly undermined the homeowner’s desire to adequately protect and appropriately maintain a suitable and inviting environment in which one would want their family to live? Incidentally creating a domino effect that cripples one’s potential for future financial prosperity? What’s wrong with the hood? Did the innovative idea (really?) of throwing up project buildings reduce individuals and families to dollar signs, thus promote these conglomerations to ONLY have a vested interest in the monthly profits? What’s wrong with the hood? Is it simply that it is the wrong color (black & yellow, black & navy, red, etc) and spotted by the opposition walking through the wrong turf? You tell me what’s wrong with the hood.

Messages are everywhere. Please click the link and have a listen. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYLvyAg-5ig

Ever try to do multiple things at once? The concept of multitasking is the lingering fad that gently entices you to believe that something is wrong if you cannot perform 6 things at once. After all, isn’t everyone doing it? Seriously? And if so, at what cost and who suffers? I personally do not like dividing my attention between tasks but I do it anyway. Last night provided me with an unexpected reflection of why that may not be a good thing. At some point, I was simultaneously (only fooling myself) writing, watching the Yankee game (GUILTY PLEASURE) and having a telephone conversation (I’ll use that term loosely) with my daughter. Once or twice she inquired if I was really listening to her. “Of course I am” was my response while sitting on pins and needles hoping the Yankees squirm their way out of a tight jam against Minnesota. I am sure my attention varied somewhere in the 60% range (sorry L’Oreal). By the time we were wrapping up the conversation, I asked if she wanted a wakeup call. She said to call her at 6:15am. I assured her I would! The next morning I intentionally got up at 6:15am to call her. Instead of dialing her phone right away, I got sidetracked by responding to a text from the previous evening. When I did call her, it was 6:30am. I got her machine and figured that she was up already. I did not make another attempt to call her. Normally I would but today I did not.

When my daughter called me, she thanked me for calling her LATE (so much for contracting with my client; the shoe is on the other foot). She smugly remarked that it was a good thing that she had not relied exclusively on me to wake her up (wow- self determination; nice but OUCH) From there, I was on the defensive for the rest of the conversation. My weak excuse was I expected her to be up when she did not answer. In my mind, had I minimized the importance of the contract between us? But I volunteered to call her. SO NOT GOOD!! I had done such a piss poor job at tuning in to her on the phone the previous night and subsequently it affected the delivery of my work. In my defense, I am not feeling well physically. I have caught a cold and it turned worse overnight and I am miserable. But the client who really needed my assistance would not be so forgiving. It has to be about the client; in this case my daughter. I dropped the ball just like the Yankees did a few times during their battle. But they reigned victorious at the end of the night because they persisted. Go Yankees! Go Yankees! So shall I!

There's a message in the music, please click the attached link. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccLbPCY1g2M

It is Friday night and I am sitting in my living room listening to pleasant, familiar sounds coming from the local high school playing field. The school is celebrating homecoming and based on the volume from the marching band and the cheering from the stands, I dare guess that it is being enjoyed by both spectators and players alike. No, there is not a wild police chase careening through the streets. I can’t rightly say that an elderly lady is being mugged for the money she is carrying, either. Sorry to disappoint and happy to do so (quite a feat), but I am not a victim of vandalism. Last time I checked, I did not step over dead bodies to get to my house. You gotta love the media; really! After all, they can spin a story and package it to appear so convincingly true! And for those who heavily rely on the different venues for news, it is increasingly a challenge to separate fact from fiction. Now, I do not deny that any of the aforementioned situations could not happen in Newark, crime happens EVERYWHERE. It is incredible how an incident can happen in the city of Newark and that one incident will continue to be the yardstick by which ALL Newarkers are measured. You’d be surprised the questions I get asked regarding my experiences as a resident of Newark.

What thoughts are conjured up when you hear Newark, NJ? Do you think about the very real biases that plague a distinct portion of its minority residents? Do you even wonder how it is that so many African American men have an overwhelming presence in the prison system? Dare it be by design? Or are African American men simply running rampant and committing these crimes they are being accused of? Sadly, I know firsthand that is not always the case. It seems that myths are more readily digested because they serve the purpose of those perpetuating those myths. I suppose I should believe in Santa Claus too, huh? Coming into the world of social work, I recognize the diligence needed to be a change agent. I welcome that. I refuse ‘to pass the buck’ or become complacent. This is just the beginning as I willingly champion the causes of our underserved and misrepresented persons in society.

I did begin this message stating that it is Friday night. Just a reminder, it is still Friday night. Have fun!Take a few minutes to watch this video. The first 10 seconds is a commercial. Enjoy!

http://music.aol.com/video/just-got-paid/johnny-kemp/sony:14210962